ICON – Infant crying and how to cope
Information for parents and carers
BABIES CRY! Infant crying is normal and it will stop.
A baby’s cry can be upsetting and frustrating. It is designed to get your attention and you may be worried that something is wrong with your baby.
Your baby may start to cry more frequently at about 2 weeks of age. The crying may get more frequent and last longer during the next few weeks, hitting a peak at about 6 to 8 weeks.
Every baby is different, but after about 8 weeks, babies start to cry less and less each week.
What can I do to help my baby?
Comfort methods can sometimes soothe the baby and the crying will stop. Babies can cry for reasons such as if they are hungry, tired, wet/dirty or if they are unwell.
Check these basic needs and try some simple calming techniques:
- Talk calmly, hum or sing to your baby
- Let them hear a repeating or soothing sound
- Hold them close – skin to skin
- Go for a walk outside with your baby
- Give them a warm bath
These techniques may not always work. It may take a combination or more than one attempt to soothe your baby.
If you think there is something wrong with your baby or the crying won’t stop speak to your GP, Midwife or Health Visitor. If you are worried that your baby is unwell call NHS 111.
The crying won’t stop, what can I do now?
Not every baby is easy to calm but that doesn’t mean you are doing anything wrong. Don’t get angry with your baby or yourself. Instead, put your baby in a safe place and walk away so that you can calm yourself down by doing something that takes your mind off the crying. Try:
- Listening to music, doing some exercises or doing something that calms you
- Call a relative or friend – they may be able to help you calm or may be able to watch your baby.
After a few minutes when you are calm, go back and check on the baby.
It’s normal for parents to get stressed, especially by crying. Put some time aside for yourself and take care of your needs as well as your baby’s to help you cope.
What not to do…
Handling a baby roughly will make them more upset. Shouting or getting angry with your baby will make things worse.
Sometimes parents and people looking after babies get so angry and frustrated with a baby’s cry they lose control. They act on impulse and shake their baby. Shaking or losing your temper with a baby is very dangerous and can cause:
- Learning disabilities
- Physical disabilities
Remember – this phase will stop! Be an ICON for your baby and cope with their crying. Babies cry, you can cope!
Share the ICON message!
It isn’t just parents who get frustrated at a baby’s cry. Think very carefully about who you ask to look after your baby.
Share the ICON message with anyone who may look after your baby.
Check that caregivers understand about how to cope with crying before you decide to leave your baby with them and share this ICON information with them.
Reminder about Safe Sleeping:
- The safest place for your baby to sleep for the first six months is in a cot in the same room as you
- It is not safe to bring your baby into your own bed to sleep
- When putting your baby down for a sleep, place them on their back, with their feet at the foot end of the cot
- Don’t let them get too hot – 16 to 20 degrees celsius is comfortable
- It is dangerous to sleep with a baby on a sofa or in an armchair, never do this
- Make sure that your baby is not exposed to cigarette smoke, as this increases their risk of cot death.
You can talk to your Midwife or Health Visitor about all aspects of crying and safe sleeping.
Further information and support
As a new parent, there is a lot of support available to help you and your child get off to the best start. Below is a list of useful services and websites you might find useful.
Manchester Health Visiting Service
Manchester Health Visiting Service offers comprehensive advice and support to parents and carers of children from pre-birth to four and a half years. A health visitor is a registered nurse or midwife with specialist additional qualifications in child, family and public health who offers a range of advice and information on feeding, parenting skills, sleeping and healthy eating and a whole lot more. The Health Visiting Service is divided into six districts across Manchester and offer home visits and healthy child drop-ins.
Infant Feeding Team
The Infant Feeding Team sits within the Manchester Health Visiting Service and are there to help parents and carers with any concerns you may have about feeding your baby. The team can be contacted on as follows:
- Call: 0161 720 5982
- Facebook: @infantfeedingteam
- Facebook messenger: m.me/infantfeedingteam
- Email: firstname.lastname@example.org
- Find out more
There are a number of children’s centres across Manchester that offer a variety of friendly activities, events, help and support to families of children aged 0 to 5 years, such as:
- Advice on parenting, local childcare options and access to specialist services for families
- Baby massage sessions
- Breastfeeding support
- Stay and play opportunities
These services may vary depending on the area where you live and it is advisable that you contact your nearest area for details.
Home-Start is a local community network of trained volunteers and expert support helping families with young children through their challenging times.
NHS 111 can help if you have an urgent medical problem and you are not sure what to do.
To get help from NHS 111, you can:
- The Breastfeeding Network
- LeLeche GB
- Association of Breastfeeding Mothers
- Lullaby Trust
© Copyright reserved. This page has been produced with the permission of NHS West Hampshire Clinical Commissioning Group.
Review date: August 2020.